Friday, 30 June 2017

Chaman ji’ I AM WITH YOU (#ALetterToHer)

(During my BPO career, some five years back, I got to meet a women really passionate about her performance at work. She looked more than thirty which is an age of very few call center workers. She was not very friendly with others in our team, though not rude with anyone for sure. It was once, that both of us were chosen for an upskill training and being very talkative I happen to make her somewhat open to me. Chamanji had an excellent tone, confident voice and kind of perfect spoken English but lacked in her computer proficiency. However, her spirit was really high and I helped her in learning MS Excel. She used to talk to her sister and her kids in the breaks. One day while she was telling me that she was not able to take proper sleep as she used to reach home at 4 in the morning and woke up at 6 in the morning to get her kids ready for school. Her explanation provoked me to ask her about her husband. With a bit of hesitation Chamanji told me in short where she had come from. She was lady from Hyderabad who was married in her college days only and has two young kids.  But being a victim of domestic violence, she had left her husband. The recall of her bad days got her emotional and the day came to an end. I was on leave for a week from next day and I got a better opportunity which made me resign from my then existing job. On my last day in that workplace while I was clearing off my dues and other formalities of relieving, I saw Chmanji sitting alone and quite again. It was probably not the right to talk to her on such sensitive issue, so I write up a letter for her..)

Dear Chamanji, 

You are an ideal for me and most ladies of our country, I believe. Even after being a single parent responsible for managing uniform to homework of your kids, what a zeal you own even at this age! I was earlier impressed with your hardwork and confidence but after knowing where you have come from. You inspire me stand up against all odds. Though I also apologies if I hurt you by asking about your husband. I had a thought of speaking over the responsibility that men should share in a family and there was no intention of mocking over your personal life tragedy.

You are women of tremendous power, someone I can relate with Godess Durga. I salute the way you manage such an appraisable performance at work even after not being able to take proper sleep for weeks. You are not just courage but also compassion. How much care about your kids! How kind you are to everyone even on those who have kind of spoiled your life. I noticed you only used respectable words for your husband who has forced you to forsake restful afternoons and peaceful nights inside a home. At first, I had felt really bad about that man who just thought about the color of your skin and could not see your beautiful heart. But now, I think you are right respecting him more than ever because he has made you what you are. Just think how people clap for you when you make shocking customer satisfaction record and all of us clap for you.

You know what, there very few women like you in this world. So always be this. Though you said people don’t respect women who stand up for their rights, I say I am with you. I not only support you, I respect you and appreciate you.

You know, I feel had the first women ever compromised with domestic violence and had stood up firm against this, it would not have been a story of every next door. Those who said portrayed Indian women as a silent doll and did not allow her to raise voice against that are the people responsible for the sufferings of all women who had to live that afterwards. Even women rarely support women. They bear it and want others to bear it on the name of culture and sanskars. But I tell you those are clever women who remain cultured figures in society but own bad heart inside their soul.

Thank God I have met someone as nice as you in this life. I may be in other city or somewhere away from you but my heart will always pray for your happiness and dreams.
God bless you! 

Your fan and well-wisher.. 
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Meena Kandasamy’s latest novel, When I Hit You, would for sure help in battling against domestic violence.  I am so excited to read it.


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