Friday, 21 October 2016

Be the best husband

Few weeks ago, I had to stay back in office for a client call. One of my colleagues, Praveen, also stayed with me. Call ended at 8.30 PM and we were heading to catch our drop cabs. Suddenly his phone rang and I heard his son saying loudly, "Papa, kab aaoge? I want to sleep. Jaldi aao." Curiously I asked Praveen about his son after he finished the call. He said his son doesn't sleep without him and that's why he was calling his Papa. I found it very sweet; a father is making his son sleep every night. I thought Praveen is not like those conventional fathers who think its all mother's job. But next day only I came to know another interesting fact of his personality. Praveen never took his wife for any movie outing ever since he got married. I guess, at-least he has completed 8 years of his married life but he never watched a single movie in theater with his wife. I couldn't stop myself asking him the reason. His cold reply was "Kya jarurat hai jane ki? Ghar pr dekh lete hai." When I asked if his wife is fine with it, he said he never cared when she asked to go out for a movie. And now she gave up.

Time is changing indeed. Mothers are changing and fathers as well. But I feel in race of becoming the best father for their kids, husbands are paying no minds for their wives.Like, Praveen is doing what best a father should do but at the same time he is a bit ignorant towards his wife’s feelings.
I feel you could be world's best father but not the best husband if you are doing these things :
1. You wake up hearing your infant crying. In a single minute you bitterly ask back to back questions to your wife. “Is baby hungry? Is everything okay in the diaper? Is baby not well?” But you couldn't notice that this is the third time baby cried and you were sleeping rest of the two times.
2. Your toddler has started with solids. You are instructing your wife to try variety of 'home-made' foods for the baby. You feel happy that your baby tried cerelac, fruits, daal, and soup in a single day and house is still clean. But at dinner table you complain that there is nothing new in dinner, same daal and same sabzi.
3. Your baby is unwell. You couldn't work in office thinking about baby's health. You come back and ask wife about medicines if she has given all. You take the baby and try to make him/her comfortable in your arms. But you don't care that your wife is also coughing severely and has fever. You think it’s not important to ask about “her medicines”.
4. You are in a mall and suddenly in kid's section you come across a beautiful dress for your daughter or a dashing jacket for your son. You immediately go to your wife and give her to keep that in shopping bag for getting billed. But when she tries to show you few kurtas that she picked from sale stuff, you frown and say "Kitne to kurte hai tumhare pas, aur lene hai?"
5. Your kid has got A+ in drawing class and when he/she shows you that sheet, you feel so proud of your kid. You promise your kid to get a new toy for getting A+. But you never care to admire your wife's cooking. She is consistently cooking your favorite dishes every day.
6. During a birthday party, you are busy with your friends. You are telling them how talented your kids are, to how many hobby classes they are going and how much you care about their studies. But you are least interested in telling them that your wife has recently changed her job and she is getting a better salary now.
7. With your kids, you are watching their favourite TV stuff. You have no problem in watching cartoons either and you giggle when your son addresses you Nobita (of doraemom). But when your wife takes remote in her hand and tries to access any of her favourite shows, you snatch it immediately and change to any xyz news channel.
8. Being father of a daughter, you feel great in debating over gender equality. You want to give equal opportunities to your son and daughter. But when your wife shows her willingness to go back to work, you give her a heavy speech that wife should handle home and kids and that you are earning sufficient for the family. 
9. You know your kids are growing fast and being a caring father you want to get them scooty/bike so that they can save time in switching between school and tuition. But you are not bothered about a repair work at home about which your wife is complaining since long.
10. You want to secure your kids future and that’s why you are interested in buying properties for them. You are doing research on different investment plans and you feel it's something very important. But you never spend a minute in thinking about any miss-happening which could be with your job or health. How your wife will manage kids and family financially then?
Please think about it. I might be over expecting or exaggerating things but all I want to convey is becoming a caring-loving husband is as important as becoming a super cool father. If any of the things you are doing or close to doing , please improve. You wife needs you and your support.

No comments:

Post a Comment